Warning! This article may contain spoilers.

The following is a transcript for the English version of Chapter 19: The Lightning Chariot.

Air Battle

(Pit rushes to the door to start the level.)

Pit: I'm ready to roll!

Viridi: Then let's get to rescuing Palutena!

(Pit leaps through the door and into enemy-infested skies.)

Pit: Underworld troops on the scene!

(Forces of Nature troops swoop in and start attacking the Underworld troops.)

Viridi: I'll send in some backup. If they get in your way, I'll pull them out.

Pit: You know, you can be really nice when you try.

Viridi: The force field around Palutena's temple is incredibly strong. We're going to need to borrow the Lightning Chariot.

Pit: That sounds AWESOME!

(The Touch Screen displays the Lightning Chariot.)

Viridi: It's a superfast battle carriage that travels the galaxy. It's also pulled by unicorns!

Pit: And that's what I'm gonna use to break through the force field?

Viridi: Exactly.

Pit: So basically, you're telling me to slam a horse cart into a brick wall.

Viridi: Sure, if you want to put it crudely.

Pit: Which means I might die.

Viridi: Well, anything's possible.

Pit: Does the Lightning Chariot at least have air bags?

Viridi: Last I checked, no.

Pit: Uh, I'm not a safety nut, but even I draw the line somewhere!

Viridi: So you don't really care about saving Palutena after all.

Pit: Grrrr...

Viridi: She could be in agony at this very moment. She could be trapped inside a dungeon of madness. She could be crying out, "Oh, help me, Pit! Oh, please!"

Pit: OK OK OK OK OK! I guess it IS my duty to rescue her.

Viridi: Yeah, I know! That was my point!

(Viridi flies Pit low to the ground.)

Pit: Aren't I a little low to be flagging down a galactic chariot?

Viridi: It's not like those chicken wings of yours are really helping any.

Pit: Yeah, yeah.

Viridi: Don't worry. I've got a great plan.

Pit: This oughta be good.

Viridi: Have you ever been to the circus, Pit? My favorite act is the human cannonball. It's just such a...thrill ride!

Pit: Where are you going with this?

Viridi: We're going to do our own version...but with an angel instead!

Pit: No way, uh-uh, absolutely NOT!

Viridi: Ugh, you're so boring! Where's your sense of adventure?

(Pit briefly flies around the Angel Cannon before being placed inside of it.)

Viridi: Three! Two! One! FIRE!

(The Angel Cannon shoots Pit into the sky.)

Pit: Waaaaaaaaoh!

(Pit eventually comes to a stop and arrives in space.)

Pit: I could've been blown to smithereens!

Viridi: But you weren't! Look on the bright side!

Pit: So, what's all this?

Viridi: These are patterns formed by galactic particles. Beautiful, aren't they?

(Pit continues through hoards of enemies.)

Viridi: The Underworld presence is very strong. Hmm.

Pit: Do you think they're after the Lightning Chariot too?

Viridi: Huh? Here it comes behind you, Pit!

(The Lightning Chariot zips by.)

Pit: Ah! It is CRUISIN'!

Viridi: The chariot's headed for its home base. Stay on it!

(Pit pursues it into a portal.)

Hades: Well, hello again, friends!

Pit: Hades!

Viridi: Ugh, not you again.

Hades: Just look at the two of you sneaking around behind Palutena's back. It's classic.

Pit: Shut your mouth!

Viridi: What do you want, Hades?

Hades: The Lightning Chariot, obviously!

Viridi: You creep! Just go away already!

Hades: It's one slick ride. A veritable goddess magnet, if you will.

Viridi: Please. I'm a goddess, and I would never ride in that thing.

Hades: But Pitty here sure likes it!

Pit: Are you only here to get in our way?!

Hades: My intentions are always honorable. You know that.

Pit: Whatever you're REALLY up to, we're going to find out!

(Lightning begins to strike overhead.)

Pit: Ugh! Whoa!

Hades: It gives me such pleasure to see you suffer, Pitty Pat.

Viridi: Just ignore him, Pit. The Lightning Chariot is up ahead.

Pit: We've got to get to it before the Underworld does!

(Pit approaches a large tower in the distance.)

Viridi: Both the Lightning Chariot and its master are in that tower. I'll drop you off on the ground floor.

Pit: OK. I'll make my way up from there.

Viridi: Just so you know, the tower's really, really tall. Get ready to feel the burn!

Pit: No worries there. Have you seen these thighs?

Viridi: Ready for land battle, Pit?

Pit: Affirmative!

(Viridi sends Pit through the entrance of the Lightning Chariot Base.)

Land Battle

Part 1

(Pit lands inside the Lightning Chariot Base.)

Pit: So the Lightning Chariot is in this tower, huh?

???: Who dares trespass on my domain? Leave before you get hurt!

Pit: Who said that?

Chariot Master: I've had many names in my life, but now I am called the Chariot Master.

Pit: Oh, great! You're the guy I'm looking for. Listen, I have a favor to ask you. Would you mind if I borrow your chariot for just a little while?

Chariot Master: Your foolishness is matched only by your rudeness. How dare you charge in here, flinging unreasonable requests at me? I've half a mind to turn you into galactic roadkill!

Viridi: You can't really blame him for being upset. That was kind of rude.

Pit: Then I guess there's only one thing I can do. I'll go talk to this Chariot Master guy in person. He's at the top of this tower, right?

Viridi: That's right. Hey, look at you acting all assertive! You're just grabbing life by the horns and shaking it until it moos!

(Pit heads up a long walkway.)

Pit: there an elevator in this tower?

Viridi: Oh, would Prince Pit like me to scatter rose petals in his path too? Listen, this is the only way up, so you'd better get a move on.

(Pit heads into a room with a platform to get across.)

Viridi: You'll need to ride that platform to move forward.

Pit: You know what's weird, Viridi?

Viridi: What?

Pit: There sure are a lot of Underworld troops here.

Viridi: This tower does seem to be lacking proper defenses.

Hades: Any riffraff can just waltz on in. After all, little Pitty here had no problems. But I must admit that I ADORE running amok in other people's homes.

Chariot Master: Another uninvited guest? Very well. At least show your face. So my Lightning Chariot can erase you from existence!

  • [If Pit hits the switch by the door before destroying the nearby enemies.]
Pit: Many birds, one boom!
(A row of land mines explode, destroying the enemies in the room instantly.)

(Pit heads into a room with alternating floor panels.)

Viridi: Those floor panels alternate between hurting you and not hurting you. They don't seem to have any effect on those Underworld enemies, though. Odd.

Chariot Master: That's a known issue. It'll be resolved in the next version of the tower.

Pit: Someone needs a better QA department.

(Pit enters a room with tall pillars.)

Viridi: The Underworld has taken position up on top of the pillars.

Pit: Well, what goes up... Must come down!

(Pit proceeds up a long walkway.)

Viridi: Jump pads will help you over any gaps in the walkway.

Pit: Man, climbing this tower is really a pain.

Hades: Aw, someone sounds like he wants a piggyback ride!

(Pit enters a room with narrow paths and rolling spheres.)

Pit: OK, so we've got rolling obstacles.

Viridi: And don't forget the jump pads.

Pit: Something seems familiar about this...

Hades: I guess the Chariot Master has played Donkey Kong.

(Pit enters a room with icy floors.)

Pit: Whoa! It's solid ice!

Viridi: Using an Aether Ring should keep you from slipping around.

Pit: Why does the Chariot Master have a vehicle of the gods?

Chariot Master: Isn't it obvious?

Viridi: Are you saying you're a god?

Chariot Master: I'm not saying anything.

Viridi: Aurgh! Then why even bring it up?

(Pit continues up a long walkway.)

Pit: Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

Viridi: No, we're not. No, we're not.

(Pit enters a room with land mines.)

Viridi: Be careful you don't step on any land mines.

Pit: I'll do my best.

Viridi: Mines certainly are useless on floating Underworld monsters.

Chariot Master: Yes, yes, I'm quite aware of that.

Hades: Defense really isn't your strong suit, is it? Eh, whatever. Defenses are for the weak and insecure.

(Pit hops onto a Grind Rail.)

Pit: Hey there, grind rail! Time to give these barking dogs a rest!

(Pit enters a room with a Wrecking Ball.)

Viridi: Hey, there's an oversized bowling ball. And some ugly bowling pins!

Hades: My troops are a worthy sacrifice for the sport of kings.

  • [If Pit destroys all of the Reapettes with the Wrecking Ball in one hit.]
Viridi: STRIKE!

(Pit proceeds up a long walkway.)

Pit: Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

(Pit enters a room with strong gusts of wind.)

Viridi: A severe wind advisory is in effect up ahead.

Pit: Thanks for the heads-up. But no little breeze is going to slow ME down!

(Pit proceeds through the room and hops onto another Grind Rail.)

Pit: How convenient!

Viridi: Oh, I'm so pleased that it meets your approval.

(Pit enters a room with an Exo Tank.)

Viridi: Look! The Chariot Master has an Exo Tank!

Pit: Maybe he's a gearhead.

Hades: Or a nerd!

(Pit heads onto a racetrack.)

Pit: Cool! It's a path made of light!

Viridi: Well, this is a nice design flourish.

Chariot Master: No. It's a practice track for the Lightning Chariot. It's not for amateurs!

(Pit continues up a long walkway.)

Pit: Soooo... Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?

Viridi: You know that saying that there are no bad questions? Well, there are, and this is one of them! WE ARE NOT THERE YET! But I do wish there was a way to speed up this process.

(Pit enters a room with a single, large pillar in the center.)

Pit: This pillar seems to have gems stuck on it. What should I do with them?

Hades: The same thing you always do: shoot them.

(Pit shoots a gem, lowering the pillar.)

Pit: Hey! It got lower!

Viridi: Keep knocking it down to reveal a way forward!

(Pit hits all of the gems.)

Pit: Success!

(Pit takes a Jump Pad to a higher level.)

Pit: Whoo hoo hoo hoo!

Part 2

(Pit lands on a higher level with Underworld troops.)

Viridi: Now what do we have here?

Hades: It's time for my minions to do their thing. Underlings! I'm offering 100 gold for the putz's head!

Pit: The name's Pit!

Hades: Yes. I know. Your tenure as a ring doesn't seem to have had any effect on that keen wit of yours.

Pit: Wait, you know that I was turned into a ring?

Hades: Oh, is it a secret? Then don't mind me! Mum's the word!

Pit: Did YOU turn me into a ring?

Hades: Wow, you really are clueless. Don't you know, Pit? You're the cause of all this chaos.

Pit: Whaaaaat?! That makes no sense!

Viridi: Don't let him get to you, Pit. The Underworld Army is the one to blame.

Hades: Why, thank you. That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard you say.

Viridi: You know what? You're annoying.

Hades: Yow! She's feisty! Wear gloves with this one, minions!

(Pit continues up a long walkway.)

Pit: Am I ever going to get to the top of this tower?

Viridi: I warned you before we got here that it was a long way up.

Pit: Yeah, but this place is so huge, we even had a loading screen back there.

Viridi: Shhh, they're going to hear you! We're not supposed to talk about that!

(Pit enters a room with a maze.)

Pit: Uh... Are we there yet?

Viridi: Yes. If by "there" you mean "at a maze." But it's not that big, so you shouldn't have much trouble.

  • [If Pit waits in the maze too long.]
Pit: I think I might be stuck.
Viridi: Yeah, looks like it. Just stick with a direction, and you'll get out eventually.

(Pit enters a room with Underworld troops.)

Hades: I've got a heaping helping of Underworld goodness for you, Pit!

Viridi: He's saying that more enemies are on their way. Clever, huh.

Pit: Yeah? Well, I whipped up a club-your-face sandwich! Hope YOU'RE hungry!

(Pit hops onto a Grind Rail.)

Pit: Walking's for chumps!

Viridi: Up you go!

Hades: It's like watching a roller-skating chicken.

Pit: Don't even pretend that that's not awesome!

(The Grind Rail escorts Pit through a series of shōji doors.)

Pit: Look at me go! I'm all, "whoosh whooosh!"

Hades: Eloquently put as always.

(Pit enters a room with a Cherubot.)

Pit: Score!

Viridi: Hop on in, Pit!

  • [If Pit hops into the Cherubot.]
Viridi: The Cherubot is pure mechanical brawn wrapped in an adorable package. So decimate anything that gets in your way.
Pit: Consider it done!

(Pit defeats all the enemies in the room.)

Pit: And that's the end of them! ...Are we there yet?

Viridi: Good job, and no, not yet. But there's just a little ways to go. Oh, and I have a special treat for you up ahead.

(Pit enters a room with a massive Hot Spring and a Bumbledrop.)


Viridi: You're not the only hot-spring fan.

  • [If Pit doesn't defeat the Bumbledrop while the previous dialogue plays.]
Viridi: Apparently Underworld monsters value relaxation too.
Pit: But why can't they relax somewhere else? THIS IS MY SPECIAL ME TIME!

(Pit proceeds up a long walkway.)

Viridi: Pit, I have some exciting news for both of us. The Chariot Master is just ahead. So you can finally stop asking me if we're there yet.

Boss Battle

(Pit takes a warp to a racetrack, where he encounters a chariot with the unicorn Phos.)

Pit: The Lightning Chariot!

Chariot Master: Grab the reins on Phos there.

Pit: Gee, thanks!

Chariot Master: You misunderstand. This is no gift.

(The Chariot Master zips by in another chariot. Pit then hops into his own and pursues him, initiating the battle.)

Chariot Master: If you want the Lightning Chariot, you must prove your worth.

Viridi: You need two unicorns to pull the Lightning Chariot. That means you have to defeat the Chariot Master and get the other one.

Pit: That won't be a problem!

Chariot Master: Now let's begin.

Pit: This isn't how I wanted things to go, but I have to save Lady Palutena.

Chariot Master: I understand better than you know. For my own master, I would not hesitate to dirty these hands.

Pit: So you serve someone as well?

Chariot Master: I did. I've suffered countless war wounds, but none greater than the loss of my master. I once had many comrades in arms. But they too have returned to the dust. All I have left in this life are my faithful steeds, Phos and Lux.

Pit: Oh...

Chariot Master: My body has long since degraded, and now my soul grows thin. The warrior's path inevitably leads to loss. I have no qualms about this. But you are no warrior, angel. Tell me, why do you fight?

Pit: I fight for Lady Palutena. And I fight for the people under her protection!

Chariot Master: That's not reason enough for an angel.

Pit: Who are you to question my reasons? My choices are my own! And I choose to serve the goddess of light!

Chariot Master: I admire your conviction. It speaks to the deep reservoir of strength within you. But it also proves you very foolish. And though you may be a servant of the heavens, I will show you no mercy!

Pit: And I won't need it!

Chariot Master: We understand each other then.

Pit: We do!

Viridi: Your movements might be limited, but you can still dash and dodge. Dodge out of the way, then let him have it with a power-packed dash attack. I can only assume that he wants you to pull out all the stops for this fight.

(Pit defeats the Chariot Master.)

Pit: I win!

Chariot Master: Well done...


(Pit rushes to the Chariot Master's side, who is collapsed on the ground.)

Pit: What's happening to you?

Chariot Master: Ah heh heh... I seem to have drowned in your reservoir of strength. You've proven yourself worthy of my Lightning Chariot.

Pit: Wait! I don't want it to end this way!

Chariot Master: This is the only way things can end for an old warrior. I have no regrets. I'm trusting you with Phos and Lux. And the future of this realm.

(The Chariot Master's body fades away.)

Viridi: He was an honorable warrior. Don't let his death be in vain.

(A light shines down over Pit.)

Viridi: Now let's go save Palutena.

(Viridi whisks him away.)

List of Transcript pages.
Chapter Transcripts Chapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5Chapter 6Chapter 7Chapter 8Chapter 9Chapter 10Chapter 11Chapter 12Chapter 13Chapter 14Chapter 15Chapter 16Chapter 17Chapter 18Chapter 19Chapter 20Chapter 21Chapter 22Chapter 23Chapter 24Chapter 25
Demo Transcripts Chapter 1 (Demo)Chapter 2 (Demo)Chapter 3 (Demo)Chapter 4 (Demo)
Kid Icarus 3D Anime Transcripts Thanatos RisingMedusa's RevengePalutena's Revolting Dinner
Other Transcripts How to PlayLoading ScreensRandom ConversationsWeapon ConversationsPalutena's Guidance